2011, My Year in Review

By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. ~Confucius

This year, 2011 has been a very good year to me. This highlights include more travel, both domestic and international, than I have experienced in quite a few years, the start of my blog of which this is the 100th entry (for those of you reading on Wordpress, the other 60+ entries are on Blogspot, the maturing of all three of my children into fine young adults, increased satisfaction on the job, and an improved social life with my crew of cycling friends, and meeting my current girlfriend. There were also some frustrations like not getting a delegation to a foreign land and missing my target of 1000 cycling miles. All in all, the positives far outweighed any frustrations. I wasn't sure how to reflect on the year though I had some ideas then I found a template and figured it was a good a way as any so here goes....

In 2011, I gained additional Insight into leadership at the Willow Creek 2011 Global Leadership Summit and brought in programs to my company to help align the software development group to pursue the type of work in which they excel and to ensure they are appropriately challenged in their work. I am excited that my leadership abilities are finally being recognized by the company. I have been studying leadership for about 20 years and feel I am finally at a point where I can effectively train up people to be effective leaders. A significant part of my reading (books and blogs) are about leadership. I recently updated my twitter account (DavidAOlson2) to track leadership knowledge. Twitter is a great feed for learning from other leaders.

I lost one of my one of my Uncles this year, the third in my dad's family to pass in the past 4 years. There are just two of the original 5 left. Each death is a huge loss to our families as we are a very close bunch. I also lost one of my dogs. She was with the family for about 13 years. You can read about her at: R.I.P. Mia or R.I.P. Mia those are two identical blogs hosted at different sites. I have one dog remaining, a dog that acts more cat than dog. It will be the last pet I own because I want to travel more and it would be much more difficult to travel if I had a pet to worry about. That, and I am really, really sick of dog hair being everywhere!

I don't missing coaching soccer very much though initially it was very difficult. I spent 14 awesome years coaching my kids and others but quit when I needed to help raise my grandson. (He is now being raised by his Mom and Dad. I am thankful that my son-in-law has admirably filled in the father role for my grandson, his step son.) I tried coaching again when he was 4/5 but found my enthusiasm for coaching was no longer there. All things have their season and it seems my season for coaching has passed. I am content now to sit in the stands and watch my kids and grandson play. Of course, I still have minimal tolerance for the ignorant parents who yell at their kids and berate referees so I tend to sit away from them and put on my headphones with loud music.

I started a daily blog which can be found at: DavidAOlson.Blogspot.com or DavidAOlson.Wordpress.com. I started on Blogspot based on the recommendation of a friend. I have since learned that Wordpress is more widely read and have been also posting my blogs there. I have found that I get more outside readership (outside my facebook friends) and comments on Wordpress. Three of my favorite blogs so far have been about my kids: Stephanie, Sammy, and Brian. Two of them are amongst my most read blogs. The top three most read is rounded out by Fat Bottom Girls (pun intended).

I was hugely satisfied by my progress at work. I brought in a couple of programs that were embraced by the company and will help the employees feel more satisfied in their jobs. I have recently been granted permission to begin a pilot program designed to help develop leadership skills in the up and coming leaders. The program will stretch me which is the best way to grow.

I was frustrated by my inability to pass the 1000 mile mark on my bicycles. The year started out very strong with my average miles per ride much higher than the previous year. I let myself get too busy doing other things always thinking that there would be enough time. I was the rabbit this year and did not achieve the target. Last year I was the turtle and eclipsed the 1000 mile goal. Next year, I hope to find a nice balance between the two...perhaps I will be a Hartule or a Turtare

Once again, I did not did not get a delegation to another country. I came close to going on delegation to India this year but it did not pan out. This is something I have been trying to get for a few years. The lack of progress has seen me answer the calls of a few headhunters and put them on the alert that I am open to changing companies if it includes an overseas delegation.

The biggest physical difference between me last December and this December is the gaining back of some of the weight I lost the previous  years. It' frustrating letting the achievements of hard work over two years fade away in the matter of six months. Getting too busy for the gym and cycling has it's consequences. I am back at the gym again so should be in decent shape for the spring referee and cycling seasons.

I loved spending time traveling. In the past year, I mountain biked in Arizona, fished in Canada, mouintain biked in Central Wisconsin, hiked in Tennessee (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) and traveled to Switzerland twice for business (1, 2, 3, 4, 5). I look forward to more travel time in the upcoming year. Turkey is planned for the Spring and will be the first time I have taken an overseas trip purely for pleasure. All my previous overseas trips have been for business during which I make sure I get some time to explore on my own. I hope I will also get the chance to visit India again because the 5 year absence from my friends in that country has been way too long.

Why did I spend even two minutes watching television other than Soccer and the Big Bang Theory? This took time away from the gym and from riding my bicycles and from reading and from blogging and....and....and...a myriad of other activities.

I should have spent more time riding my bicycles. I missed my goal of 1000 miles by more than a hundred miles. I enjoy riding and began riding in the Chicago quite a bit which resulted in seeing a few of the sites, miles of shoreline, and the blog Chicago Remembers.

I will never regret buying my new road bike even though with that money I could have bought just about anything else. I almost purchased a new motorcycle, a vintage 1985 Honda Interceptor for the same price as the road bike. However, I could not justify a new motorcycle, no matter how awesome, that gets just 17 mpg.

I didn’t exercise enough this year. After being religious about going to the gym or bike riding a minimum of 3 days a week for two solid years, I went off track this year resulting in gaining back most of the weight I had lost. I also did not attend church services enough of this year. I guess, too often, I let circumstances veer me off the path. I notice when I don't attend service on a regular basis, my penchant is to move toward self-centeredness and arrogance instead of being other centered. I find when I am other centered, I am much happier and, when I attend church regularly, I tend to be much more other centered.

The most relaxing place I went was mountain biking in Phoenix Arizona in February. It was only my second trip to a warm location in the winter. I rode about 100 mountain bike miles during my stay and only wiped out once. Crashing in Arizona is particularly painful since everything is either hard, sharp, or spiny. I let an Arizona friend know where I was riding every day so I wouldn't go 127 Hours, I am adventurous but now foolish, well, not always foolish. The beauty of traveling alone is that you are on your own time schedule and can see whatever you want whenever you want. The downside is that there is no one to share the joy of newfound wonders..

The best thing I did for myself this year was under take Seth Godin's challenge and start writing a daily blog. I wrote when I was younger and enjoyed it immensely. I find it helps focus me and, in a way, is therapeutic for my soul.

I am most thankful for family. I have an incredible family from my immediate family through my relatives. It's amazing that there is not a black sheep in the bunch and that anyone of them, in a heartbeat, would be there to offer support when it is needed. I will be seeing many of them at the upcoming Cousin's Christmas party on 02 Jan 2012 and am looking forward to the time to give thanks for the joy that is our family.

Happy New Year to all my readers! May you prosper in 2012!

Me, Pablo and the Short Journey

“Laughter is the language of the soul.” ― Pablo Neruda

“To feel the love of people whom we love is a fire that feeds our life.” ― Pablo Neruda

Yesterday, I walked out of Barnes and Noble with a new friend. I went into the store to purchase a bookmark but, as is usually the case, I walked out with a book, a book first published in 1952 about nine years before I was born. The book, "The Captains Verses" written by the Chilean, Nobel Prize winning Poet, Pablo Neruda, is a book of love poems. I am not sure why I chose a book of poetry, a book solely of love poems. I have not read any poetry in years. The last book of poetry I remember purchasing was The Selected Poetry of Robinson Jeffers but that was many years ago.

Perhaps I bought a book of poetry because I love the way words play together, how they combine to form sentences, paragraphs, stories that transports the mind to unimagined worlds, how they coalesce to create vivid images that play on the soul. In no literary form do words create so much beauty in such sparse usage as in poetry.

Perhaps I bought a book of love poems because love is a universal condition, because love is a defining aspect of humanity, because love is a subject that has been scribed for as long as the written word has been recorded, for as long as the words have been breathed from our souls, because love is a subject always close to my heart.

One of the unique aspects of this book is that the poems are written in both their native Spanish and in English. The original and the translation are placed on opposing pages, Spanish left and English right, so both forms are visible together.

I read the Spanish words first. I read the Spanish text aloud to get a sense for the lyricism of his thoughts, to feel the construct of the sentences, to hear the sounds of the rhymes, the alliterations Pablo includes in his creations for poetry is imagery in concert with sound, a visual and auditory communion that nourishes the spirit.

Next I read in the English text. Though missing the auditory beauty of the Spanish, I can understand the language, can see the sentiments, can feel the images, can taste the love he so eloquently expresses in his poems.

Having thoroughly explored both versions, I move on to the next poem, to the next expression of love. I move on feeling joy that I can connect further with Pablo though he died when I was a young boy. I move on feeling sadness knowing that with each passing poem, I am nearer the end of the collection, nearer the end of this short journey with Pablo.

Words Speak To Me

A room without books is like a body without a soul. ~Marcus Tullius Cicero


I love bookstores, love walking up and down the aisles surrounded by the many minds resting on the shelves, strolling next to voices that sit mute for days, weeks, years until someone reaches out a finger to caresses the spine, a hand that pulls the book off the shelf and opens the pages giving light to those words, freedom to those glorious words, allowing the words trapped for possibly decades to soar off the page, to move between minds separated by time, space, culture, and language.

Being in a bookstore can, for me, be overwhelming. When I walk in their midst, I hear them calling to me, begging me to help them breathe, to give them an avenue to share their hearts. I want them. I want them all. I want to take all of them with me. I want to give them a home, a place where they can be read, digested, loved, most of all, read and shared. I want to unleash those captive souls from the bondage of the bookstore where they must languish until someone chooses them.

It's rare that I will walk out of a bookstore empty handed. I seem to always have a new friend tucked under my arm. It's difficult to choose just one, to give one a home while the others are left behind, left behind desiring to be read. Today I walked out with Pablo Neruda. It could just as easily have been Maya Angelou or Eduardo Galeano or Vikram Seth or...or...or...

Sometimes I take a book home and fail to open it, fail to read it, fail to engage it in dialog. It sits on my shelf gathering dust and I feel guilty for ignoring it. I liberated it from the bookstore only to let it languish on my book stand ignored, starved for companionship.

It's frustrating to me that there are so many books, so much knowledge at my disposal, so many voices to be heard, so much brilliance in those pages, and, if I lived another 100 years and read 24 hours a day, I would still have too little time to love them all.

Piss Off, Pepboys!

Quality in a service or product is not what you put into it. It is what the client or customer gets out of it. ~Peter Drucker


I went to Pepboys in Arlington Heights for work on my car. Pepboys at various locations have worked on my cars numerous times in the past decade. My request was simple. I wanted two new front tires and my flat spare fixed. I asked to have the best of the three tires kept as a spare. The person taking my order, Dave, quoted me a price for the work I requested and I signed the electronic box for the work I requested - New Front Tires.

I came back a few hours later to pick up my car and was told the new tires were put on the back and the rear were put on the front as was company policy. This is not what I asked for and told Dave. This policy was not expressed to me when I specifically asked for the front tires to be replaced. He said he forgot to tell me. Either the person was incompetent or purposely did not inform me of company policy. Had I know this was policy, I would have gone to another company for new tires. The tread on my rear tires was still in good shape and I only needed my front tires replaced. I have a front wheel drive car and wanted to ensure I had the best possible traction for the upcoming winter snow season.

To make matters worse, he told me the car now pulled to the side depending upon which side one of the formerly rear tires was mounted. They tried the rears tire on both sides on the front to eliminate any mechanical reason for the pull. When I was called to pick up the car this was never mentioned. Why wouldn't they inform me there was a problem in the event I wanted to authorize additional changes? Were they afraid that I would be upset because they did not do the work as I asked and as I authorized? Or is this another expression of incompetence? Or do they typically treat the customer as morons?

I left the story quite angry at being treated with such disrespect. Pepboys, after more than a decade of servicing my vehicles, has lost my business.

I have since sent a letter to the corporate offices and posted my experience to social media services to warn other potential victims of the poor service rendered by Pepboys at this location.

Starts

Everything that has a beginning as an ending. Make your peace with that and all will be well. ~Buddha


Fundamentally, I am an entrepreneur at heart. I am not an entrepreneur in the sense that I have lots of new ideas with which to begin an enterprise. I am an entrepreneur in the respect that I love beginning new endeavors - I love the challenge of bringing order to the chaos of an new undertaking and I love the learning that goes with immersing myself in learning new skills.

I enjoy the chaos at the start of a new project. For many people, the chaos is extremely uncomfortable. The uncertainty of how the chaos will shake out and become order, it if will become order, causes them angst. Not me. I am comfortable being uncomfortable. I am comfortable not knowing if a new undertaking will progress, let alone have any chance of coming to a successful conclusion, I am comfortable not knowing how to take the next step on the project. For me, this unknown period is when I find myself being the most creative.

I thrive on herding cats. I feed off the electric energy, the nervous energy, that radiates from a team at the beginning of a project. I find it especially exciting when the activity being undertaken is brand new, is charting new territories, is not a variation on a theme. I never get bored when leading one of these endeavors as it makes use of one of my skills, the ability to help breathe order into chaos.

I am generally interested into a project up until that point that I am able to help the team move to a place of relative harmony. Once, the celestial beings, the sun, the moon and the stars have come into alignment, once the sailing becomes smooth, I begin to lose interest. If the waters are calm for long, I become completely disinterested, have trouble focusing on the task at hand. I have work friends who get the most fun out of leading teams through the middle of a project when the extreme chaos has been eliminated while others love taking a project down the final stretch and seeing it through to completion. Both of those scenarios bore me and I find myself seeking out new adventures to start. I become completely by the beginnings. The middle and ending phases of the project are equally important. It's just that they don't keep my juices flowing. My mind, when thinking about those phases, finds itself dried of any creative output.

The other beginnings that completely consume my focus is starting a new hobby or other such activity. I have had many hobbies over the years. Some last many years such as my hobby of refereeing soccer. Others are fleeting like the few weeks I was interested in the stock market. I have become adept at photography and can talk to you about f-stops, depth of field, film types, and the rule of thirds. I can craft custom handles for knives with a variety of exotic woods and other accoutrements, pick out the best steel for a blade, create the sheath from leather, carve designs into the sheath, and dye it. I know lots of facts and have many skills gleaned from my hobbies with backpacking, cycling, creative writing, coaching soccer, growing plants, mountain biking racing, etc.

When I start a hobby, I read voraciously on the subject. I dig for data in books, magazines, the internet, anywhere I can get a tidbit of information. Then I start doing. I do until I become proficient, sometimes really good. I sold a number of the photographs I took back in the 1980s. Once I'm proficient, my interest begins to wane. I never keep at anything long enough to become a true expert, never practice a skill long enough to be considered a true craftsman. I think it's because, the rate of learning for time spent on a hobby diminishes rapidly. In the beginning, a little investment of my time yields great knowledge. Toward the end it's the complete opposite and a lot of time investment yields minor gains in knowledge. Because of the diminishing returns, I will never have achieve the depth of knowledge necessary to earn PHD degree.

Sometimes, I find it frustrating that I am wired up in such a way that I will always be a generalist and will never have the extent of skill/knowledge it takes to be craftsman/expert on any one subject. However, most times, I am content that I am and always will be a generalist, a person with broad knowledge over many subject areas. I like being competent in many different facets of life.

Christmas Day 2011

Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. ~Calvin Coolidge

Another Christmas has come and gone. As always, it was a joyous time shared with family and extended family. There were presents and a communal meal. We shared, we laughed, we reminisced, we honored those who had passed and were no longer here, we talked of the dreams we have for our futures. 

Most of all, we loved each other, we loved each other despite our flaws, despite the many mistakes we had made over the years, despite our shortcomings. We loved each other because we are family. It is my understanding that not all families are as close as we are. We had the gift of my parents. We loved each other because my parents raised us to respect our siblings, respect other people, to forgive, to forget transgressions. We loved each other because our parents taught us to love. They taught us to love by modeling loving behavior, loving behavior to each other, to us, to friends. We are able to love because they first loved us.

Thanks Mom and Dad. I love you!

Turtling

All the thoughts of a turtle are turtle. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson


There are a couple of fond events in my life associated with turtling. This is not a euphemism for some depraved activity. It is about the four legged creature that carries his home on his back who's cousin the tortoise beat the hare in a mythical race in which victory went to the slow and steady over the fast and lazy. Turtling is the act of catching a turtle as fishing is to fish.

My parent's have a 'summer estate' in central Wisconsin or some my dad called the cabin seated a couple of blocks from Lake Camelot. I spent many a summer vacation at the cabin wiling the days away swimming, fishing, boating, raising havoc, and, one summer, catching turtles on nearby Lake Sherwood. To get to Lake Sherwood from Lake Camelot, we had to drag our canoe over the dam and launch it into the Eastern end of the lake. Weedy waters are the turtles preferred habitat and this end of the lake had bays choked with weeds.

Finding the turtles was easy and not so easy. The ones sunning on the logs and rocks were easy to spot but very difficult to catch because the log or tree blocks the net we used to catch them. The net was attached to a long pole to give us maximum reach when hunting.

The turtles hovering in the weeds are harder to see but, with a little practice, one learns to identify the tiny heads peaking through the green of the weeds. Once Identified, they are much easier to catch, if you know the two tricks to catching them. Trick number one is to not make direct eye contact. If they see you looking at them they dive beneath the weeds. When approaching, you must face away and monitor them out of the corner of your eye. Only in this way can you get close enough to net them. When turtles submerge, they swim off opposite to the direction of the predator. This behavior leads to the second trick. Plunge the net behind the turtle and bring it up quickly. If you utilize these two tricks, more often than not, when sorting through the weeds in the net, your prize will be found. On our best day, we probably caught a dozen turtles in a few hours. We typically kept them overnight and returned them to the lake the next day.

My next turtle adventure took place at a summer camp in Wisconsin where I, now an adult, spent the weekend with my kids and the kids of many other single parents in an outing designed to help single parents get to know each other. There was a bridge across the waterway and in the water were two large snapping turtles milling about. As a bunch of us were watching them swim in the clear water, the frog my son was holding jumped out of his hands landing in the water near the snappers. Seconds after the frog hit the water, one of the snappers head shot forward and it's powerful jaws clamped tight about the hapless frog before sucking it down into its stomach.

My young son was devastated at losing his frog but not so the other boys who ran to the end of the bridge, caught some frogs which they quickly tossed into the water and cheered as the snappers feasted. During the frenzy, a large snapper swam beneath our bridge. I plunged my hand into the water, caught the turtle by the base of his thick tail, so think my fingers and thumb did not touch each other, and hauled him up to the bridge. His legs pumped furiously, he stretched out his long neck, and, mouth agape, tried to bite me. Once the screams of the kids, who were initially terrified of the large beast subsided, they looked on in awe at the beast. I had to make sure they kept their distance because the bite from one of these large snapping turtles is formidable and they tend not to let go quickly. I kept him on the bridge for a few minutes before returning him to the water. That was fifteen years ago and was my last turtling adventure.

New Beginnings

Genuine beginnings begin within us, even when they are brought to our attention by external opportunities. ~William Throsby Bridges

As has been my Christmas tradition for the past 18 years, I attended Christmas Eve services at my church, Willow Creek Community Church in South Barrington, Illinois with my family, those people closest to my heart in all this world. The pastor's message, New Beginnings, referenced his coming to faith. His message reminded me of my coming to faith through the teachings at this church 19 years ago. I was a prodigal son that returned to church after many years of rebellion. It was a drastic change for me, a change so unlikely that many of my friends had a hard time believing I had become a Christian.

My first Christmas after my new beginning found me at Willow Creek. I volunteered to work in the children's ministry with the 2 and 3 year olds for the first service on Christmas Eve. I don't know why I chose to work with toddlers, perhaps because my kids were young and I was missing them because, per the divorce decree they were spending Christmas Eve with their mom. I had so much fun playing with the toddlers, I came back for the rest of the services that day that offered child care, I think there were 5 in total, before heading up to the auditorium for the final service of the day where I sat, alone, in a crowd of 4000 people.

A tradition at my church is built around the closing song, Silent Night. As the song is sung, we go to members of our family, the loved ones we are with, embrace them and tell them that we love them. It's an emotional time for all. At that first service, I stood there alone watching the magic of families sharing love wishing someone was there with me, someone with whom I could share my love. One of the guidelines at the end of service hug fest is that you don't do anything strange with people you don't know because, in some family traditions, slobbering is expected while in others it's taboo. While I was standing there missing my kids, a gentleman next to me ignored the don't do anything strange with people you don't know recommendation and hugged me. It was a much needed hug at that moment in my life.

For this, my 19th Christmas Eve, I was there with two of my three children, my grandson, my son-in-law and some of his relatives. As Silent Night played, we all hugged, said our I love you along with the several thousand people in the auditorium. It was at that moment that I felt the spirit of Christmas wash over me, the spirit of love that defines the season. The joy was not complete because I also felt the pain of absence for one of my children, for my son who was not at church for he has chosen to no longer attend church. It's a decision with which I don't agree but I respect that it is his decision. Before leaving church for the evening, I said a prayer for my son, a prayer which, if answered, will see my son return to church for his new beginning.

Where's My Christmas Spirit?

He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. ~Roy L. Smith

I have been having trouble feeling Christmasy this year, in fact, I am kind of in a funk. It's as if there is a void in my spirit that can't quite grasp the season that is upon us. I find this lack of enthusiasm frustrating. I am feeling sad that I am missing out on the joy that has, for my entire life, permeated the weeks approaching Christmas.  This lack of enthusiasm was poignant this morning from the moment I awoke and opened my eyes to the first day of my eleven day winter vacation and found myself, knowing that I needed to go out and finish my shopping, wishing I had to work today.

I enjoy my job these days more than I have in many years. I am being challenged in a way that is utilizing many of my skills, in ways that is stretching me to grow. This, I believe, is because my current boss both appreciates my contribution and believes in the programs I am attempting to put into place, programs designed to help our direct reports become fully engaged in their work by fully utilizing the unique gifts and talents they bring through the door every morning. I am trying to create a work force that feels enthusiastic about their work, that feels valued by Management, that feels energized when they walk through the door each day. One would think having such a great work life would inch me toward the Christmas spirit but that has not been the case.

As I was dressing to go to the stores, I was reminiscing about Christmas' past. When my kids were young, I was the one that went to the stores and did the majority of the shopping for their presents. I enjoyed matching the gifts to their individual personalities. This gift hunting was something passed down to me by mom.  I also wrapped the gifts and wrote out the tags. The tags were written with more than just a name and would give a hint to what the nature of the present. For instance, this year I am giving my 7 year old grandson a Barcelona soccer kit and the tag will be, "To: Luke Messi, From: Pep Guardiola". Deciphered, Luke is my Grandson's name, Messi is the greatest player on the planet and a favorite of my grandson, and Pep is the coach of the team. He will get a kick out of the tag name and the gift.

This year I did most of my shopping on line. It saved me time and money and was done from the warmth of my bed but did not give me the opportunity to enjoy the bustle of the crowd, to see the holiday displays, to hear the Christmas carols, in short, I missed the out on the opportunity to bask in the experience of the season, not the reason for the season, but the experience of the season that I had enjoyed for as long as I can remember.

By 8:00 am I was on the road and shopping for the few remaining gifts I wanted to get for my loved ones. The first store was not yet open so, frustrated, I went to the local mega store to get some things needed for my home. At the mega store, I was looking for a small, Swiss arm, pocket knife for my grandson but they did not have it in stock. More frustration. The next two stores went better. First a sporting good store then a book store.

The book store had holiday displays and holiday music and I started feeling a bit more merry. At the book store, I perused the aisles for about an hour for a couple of books to match the reading styles of two different people. I found two that I think will be enjoyed by the recipients. Approaching the checkout, I came to a display of book marks. Here is where I tipped over the hump and started feeling Christmasy. I found book marks to go with the books with sayings that, I felt, were perfect for the recipients.

I am feeling a bit more in the spirit but not quite there yet. Tonight I will be attending church with my family. At church, there will be Christmas decorations, Christmas music and a Christmas message. At church, I will be celebrating the real reason for the season, the birth of my Lord and Savior, celebrating the birth of the one that pulled my out of the abyss I created for myself when I was in my early 30s.  At church, I expect my heart will finally be filled with the holiday spirit.

Seeing Through Language

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't being said. ~Unknown




I just received a book from Amazon, a book I ordered a few days ago. Amazon is an amazing company. I can sit in the comfort of my home, browse their book selection which is larger than any store I've visited, read book reviews written by regular people, get referrals to similar books for comparison, then place an order and have the book delivered to my home all for less than it would cost me to head out to the local bookstore and purchase the book in person. If I had a Kindle or other such eReader, I would be able to read the book the very instant I made the purchase. If I didn't enjoy perusing the titles in the book store so much, I might never buy another book on anywhere other than Amazon.

The book is titled, "Through The Language Glass: Why the World Looks Different in Other Languages". I became aware of the book via a comment on my blog by someone reading the Iliad at the same time I was reading the Iliad. She recommended the book because it helped her understand the use of color in the Iliad. The gist of the book extracted from the prologue is that the language we grow up with influences how we experience the world.

I have long been fascinated with languages and, since I learned during my Freshman year in High School that I can't just substitute Spanish words in English grammar to speak Spanish, I have oft wondered about the way people express themselves through the spoken and written word. I have heard of languages that have no concept of the number (non-number) that is zero and wondered how they did math. I was fascinated when I heard that one of the Native American languages has no word for sorry. If a person accidentally step on someone's foot, the act of getting off their foot is an automatic sorry. If the person wasn't sorry, they would continue to stand on the person's foot.

When I travel to a country in which English is not the native language, I make sure I learn a few words, the basics; Yes, No, Please, and Thank You. I do this both because I believe it is polite to at least attempt to converse in their native tongue and I enjoy languages. Part of what intrigues me about being delegated to a foreign land for a year, is that I will be culturally immersed, I will be living in a context where it will be difficult to communicate and I am forced to learn the language of the locals, I will finally be able to achieve my lifelong goal of becoming fluent in another tongue.

How amazing would it be to see India not through an English interpretation but through a native interpretation? I would be better able to understand the culture, better understand the heart of the people I am visiting because I would be seeing them through their own language.

Erotic Wine

We tend to think of the erotic as an easy, tantalizing sexual arousal. I speak of the erotic as the deepest life force, a force which moves us toward living in a fundamental way. ~Audre Lorde


Ever taste an erotic wine? Wine is sensual pleasure, an encounter with a good wine pushes the bounds of sensuality into the realm of eroticism, an eroticism that engages the senses of sound, sight, smell, touch, taste, fantasy in a powerful, almost sexual manner.


The experience begins with the pour, the tumbling of the wine into the glass, a glass with curves reminiscent of a woman's body, giving off a soft murmur as it clashes with the crystal, a subtle voice whispering sweet nothings into the ears, saying come to me my lover. She tumbles into the glass a, burgundy waterfall, a dark red lipstick coating plump, moist lips, lips hungry for a kiss.

The glass is swirled, the wine dances, breathes, the wine takes in oxygen intensifying the smell emanating into the air. As the swirl stops, the wine slides down the sides of the glass a fine silk flowing over the smoothness of a woman's body, the wetness eases slowly down the inner wall of the glass leaving residual liquid, an effect the French call tears. These are tears of joy as the wine anticipates union with her lover.

Is the wine bold in flavor a voluptuous woman in a fitted red dress? Is the flavor light, a lithe lady with subtle curves, curves betraying the fact that she is all woman? The first hint comes from the aroma freed by the swirl, the bouquet wafts into the nose giving the first intimation of her flavor. Drive the nose into the vessel, breathe deeply of the perfume, inhale her essence, become intimately aware of her scent such that you can recognize solely by her smell, a smell that causes arousal.

Tip the glass and let her brush lightly across your lips, sip in her essence, feel the heart racing at the first taste, the first kiss of a newly acquainted lover. Swish her in your mouth side by side, experience the liquid sunshine, roll her over your tongue, let your tongues dance together in an intimate ballet, a ballet of two lovers eager to share in sensual pleasures. Feel the smoothness of the wine reminiscent of the soft skin of a woman's inner thigh.

It's time for the climax. Swallow her, experience the ecstasy of two lovers in intimate embrace, savor the flavor and enjoy the orgasmic pleasure as she washes over your tongue and down your throat. Then smile because, though glass is empty, the bottle is nearly full and there is a long evening of loving ahead.

The Helpless Desk

If you don't want to be replaced by a computer, don't act like one. ~Arno Penzias



My work PC died last Thursday. I was smack dab in the middle of creating content for my upcoming leadership training course when the machine froze. I tried to reboot a few times to no avail. It would get just so far then stop. There was no indication that it had stopped other than the cursor flashing on the screen, hypnotically blinking on and off, giving me vain hope that something would happen, a miracle perhaps, and the machine would come back to life. Just a minor glitch I was hoping, one of those bugs that strike at random times which a couple of reboot attempts would clear out and all would be smooth sailing. Nothing happened except the continuously flashing cursor. I broke out in a cold sweat knowing what lie ahead of me - an encounter with the IT helpless desk. A quagmire so debilitating that one phone call is enough to suck the will to live right out of your body.

I could have played Jesus and rose my PC from the dead but, at my company, all PC work must be administered through IT.  Nothing in my work world is so frustrating as calling the helpless desk and this call was no different. It ended as I had expected. Sorry, we cannot help you because you have a Windows 7 machine and we only support the 10+ year old Windows XP platform. You will need to call your PC manufacturer for a replacement hard drive because it is still under warranty then reinstall the software on your own.

By the time I was able to have a new hard drive installed and the machine reconfigured, I had lost a day and a half at work. Luckily, I had just backed up my data the morning before the crash so I was able to recover everything I had created but was not able to get back an important website I had found which was going to be a big help for my training program.

As I was going to access some company websites with my resurrected computer to do some management activities, I discovered my SmartCard, my electronically encoded company ID card, had been disabled because of issues with attempting to log in on another PC during the day and a half of the dead computer. The IT provided tools would not unlock my card so I had to call the helpless desk again. Sorry, your SmartCard cannot be unlocked because it is an older model. A new card will be sent to you in the mail.

When will I get my card?

Sorry, I cannot tell you how long it will take.

I need my card to do my end of year work and I will be out of the office after Thursday. When will they mail out my card?

Sorry, I cannot tell you how long it will take.

To paraphrase a quote my dear, departed dad, "The IT helpless desk is a wart on the ass of progress."

9 Hours Later

The modern airplane creates a new geographical dimension. A navigable ocean of air blankets the whole surface of the globe. There are no distant places any longer: the world is small and the world is one. ~Wendell Willkie


I find it amazing that I can board a plane in Chicago, doze off, and wake up in Switzerland 9 hours later. To put this in perspective, it takes me the same amount of time to drive from my home to Northern Wisconsin. I can be in India in 24 hours which is the time is the same amount of time one can drive from Chicago to Arizona. Just 150 years ago it took pioneers 6 months to travel from Missouri to Oregon with a wagon train. Modern transportation has opened up the world to us, gives us the opportunity to explore new countries, to seek out new cultures and peoples, to boldly go to places our grandparents could only dream about. With the world at our fingertips, I also find it amazing that many people don't avail themselves of the opportunity and visit other parts of this world, that people don't take the opportunity to stretch themselves, to broaden their perspective on life. I don't understand the mindset that does not want to explore.

First Snow

A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water. ~Carl Reiner


We had our first snow of the year yesterday. It wasn't a deep snow or a lasting snow but it was of heavy snowflakes, big flakes of snow, wet white crystals floating down from the gray sky that melted on my exposed skin leaving but a speck of water where once was crystalline beauty. It was cold enough for them to accumulate, huddle together on the streets and sidewalks but not cold enough for them to hang around for more than a few hours. Just enough snow to paint the world a beautiful white, just enough to hide the flaws of the urban jungle beneath a brand new, silky white blanket, just enough to make me pause and take notice how pretty the woods can be when the dark branches are dusted with the white powder and the green evergreen branches bend, sway beneath the accumulated weight of the tiny seemingly weightless flakes, just enough to make the sidewalks slick and add a bit of uncertainty in traction, just enough to cause drivers to drive overcautiously because they forget how to navigate a Chicago winter, just enough to let me know my tires will need to be replaced soon, just enough to remind me of the terrible blizzard last winter that shut down the entire city, just enough for me to curse being born in a Northern climate.

Ancient Words

A book is the only place in which you can examine a fragile thought without breaking it, or explore an explosive idea with fear it will go off in your face. It is one of the few havens remaining where a man's mind can get both provocation and privacy. ~Edward P. Morgan

I have just finished the Art of War by Sun Tzu written circa 550 BC. Prior to that, there was The Iliad and The Odyssey both accredited to Homer and written circa 725 BC. Sun Tzu penned his book in Chinese, Homer in Greek. Dwelling upon these works, it occurred to me that I had just learned from books scribed in a language I did not understand, that I had communed with the ancients through books written in BC*, Before Christ times.

When reading the history of the works on Wikipedia, it dawned upon me that language, in particular written language, is very powerful, so powerful that it is a defining aspect of Man and a key factor in the growth of our knowledge and development of our society, a factor, without which, our ability to pass knowledge down to future generations would be via the spoken word, a medium that frequently morphs the data instead of accurately capturing information for future study and gift wrapping the wisdom for our children.

The ideas were thought by the only being known to write and those ideas, written on paper and bound between two covers, are extremely powerful. That the term bound seems a misnomer for the passing down of books because, by the virtue of being recorded in books, the ideas are now unbound by space or time. Books have the ability to persuade an individual, to unite the masses, to topple a government, to change a heart, to transform a life, to connect both disparate and like-minded people around the world. Books are so powerful that governments have been known to ban them, burn them in a misguided attempt to control the people, to hide the atrocities of those in power.

I find it truly amazing that, because we have learned to record our thoughts in writing, I have the opportunity more than two thousand years after the fact, to drink in the thoughts of Homer, to savor the wisdom of Sun Tzu, to masticate on the ideas of minds both ancient and modern, to learn from people I would never have had the opportunity to otherwise encounter. I am much richer a person, we are a wealthier society for having such limitless opportunity.

With this great capital at our fingertips, it's sad that many in society don't have access to this invaluable resource and are forced to live a life devoid of ancient secrets. It is sadder still that there are people on this earth that cannot read. The real travesty, though, is that amongst this bounty so many choose a life of intellectual poverty because they will not read books, that in this era of unrivaled access to written media people refuse to commit any time to seek out and dwell upon the wisdom of the ancient words.

* I forego the politically correct use of Before Common era as the expression of BC because much of what is called political correctness is feeble minded at best and in the case of 'before common era' to be downright idiotic. If you ask the politically correct people when the common era began, they will, at some point, have to admit it began at the birth of Christ. The Before Christ annotation is to denote a point in history. That it happens to also be tied to a religious date does not change history. Ignoring the phrase Before Christ is to ignore some of the rich multi-cultural heritage passed down to us by our ancestors. In the quest for a truly enlightened society, why not just call it what it truly represents?

Problem Preventer

It is well known that "problem avoidance" is an important part of problem solving. Instead of solving the problem you go upstream and alter the system so that the problem does not occur in the first place. ~Edward de Bono

The Hero

I have seen many projects during my 25 years in the business world. I have seen successful projects, projects that failed miserably, and every degree of success between the two extremes. I have seen projects headed for disaster that were rescued by the heroic efforts of the team members or by a hero assigned to rescue the project. This hero riding in on his trusty steed to save the day against seemingly insurmountable odds is deeply ingrained in the American Folklore, it is an underpinning of our cultural identity. We read variants of this story in our books, see it in our movies when the Man With No Name rains justice upon a town that killed a sheriff for discovering their illicit secret. The hero has been played by Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, Audi Murphy, Batman, Superman and countless others famed in American mythology and lauded by the masses.

One would like to think that this hero worship exists only in our folklore, that we Americans have outgrown the need for heroes to worship and are able to recognize the hero that is every man. That we have equal respect for those that labor quietly as well as those wearing the cape, that we heap adulation upon those who steadfastly raise their families, that we bestow honor upon the laborer as he picks the ripened fruit from the vine. But, we have not. Hero worship is so deeply ingrained in our culture that athletes and movie stars are put on a pedestal. This hero worship is rampant in American business, an entity that should be pragmatic for riches are on the line.

Hero worship is an aspect of the American business system that troubles me because of its penchant to adulate those that solve problems and ignore those that by careful attention to detail, by effective planning, by calculated risk mitigation, prevent a crisis from manifesting. I don't fault business for rewarding the heroes that rescue a failing project for they tend to have a valuable skill set and there are times when this skill is vital to saving a business or a project. My problem is that the problem preventers go unnoticed, go unrewarded.

Annual Employee Review Process

Because our business leaders were raised watching the Lone Ranger save the day, they tend to equate the best workers with problem fixers and tend not to see the quiet hero, the person that is heroic for ensuring a project stays the steady course to a successful conclusion by avoiding most of the pitfalls that would require heroic action. Come review time, the comment most often heard about these quiet heroes is that they didn't do anything special, that everything on the project went smoothly and anyone could run a project that doesn't have major obstacles. What is missed is that the project went smoothly because the quiet hero prevented problems from escalating to a point that heroic action was necessary. The risks were planned for and mitigated such that the crises were averted. The real travesty is in the review process when the person that did not take adequate measures to prevent the problem from occurring is lauded as a hero for solving the problem when it occurred, a problem their shortsightedness allowed to occur in the first place.

One of our American phrases is, "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." Heroic action is a cure for a problem and it can be very expensive. It frequently involves overtime for the employees which not only raises costs but also takes its toll on the health of the employees. Sometimes the heroic action requires getting rid of people to ensure the company has enough money to stay afloat. Other times big money is spent to bring in highly compensated temporary workers.

Contrast this with the person that keeps the project on the steady course, who spends in a predictable fashion, where the workers don't have to jump through hoops to correct the course because the project is run so well it typically needs just minor course corrections.

Who is the real hero? Is it the person who spectacularly saved the day because they resolved a problem they should have been prevented or the person who through foresight and tactical planning prevented the crisis from ever manifesting or, if it did manifest, had countermeasure in place to minimize the impact? My vote is for the problem preventer.

Cinnamon Girl

I wanna live with a cinnamon girl, I could be happy the rest of my life with a cinnamon girl.
A dreamer of pictures I run in the night You see us together, chasing the moonlight, My cinnamon girl.

~Neil Young

I believe we all have our cinnamon girl, the beauty that captured our imagination with just a fleeting glance, the woman that captures our heart in that brief instant we lock eyes, that perfect being we saw for but an instant then never saw again. She was perfect, perfect in every way we could imagine. But she was ethereal and vanished as we slowly exhaled the breath the stuck in our lungs when we first caught site of her exquisite beauty. She is the girl of our dreams, our ultimate fantasy.

Of course it's a fantasy, a fantasy we can toy with because we never have to get down to the real work required to make a long lasting relationship. It's a fantasy because she is a mere snapshot in time, a face that will never grow old, a body that will never suffer illness or the decay of age. It's a fantasy because we only see in her the possibility of physical intimacy. It's a fantasy because there is no conflict which, when worked through, brings about deepening emotional  intimacy, the intimacy that counts most in a relationship. It's a fantasy because she is just a shell, a body without a mind, without a heart. She can be anything we want her to be. Almost anything we want her to be. For the fantasy can never be real and she can never be ours.

Narrow Focus

Most people have no idea of the giant capacity we can immediately command when we focus all of our resources on mastering a single area of our lives. ~Tony Robbins


One of my regular readers has told me that I write too much on the topic of leadership, that it seems all I ever write about somehow is connected to the topic of leadership. My first instinct was to tell the person she was wrong, that I write about many things and leadership is but one of those topics. That was my first instinct, a reaction born of emotion instead of rationale. I have learned to check my initial reactions to a challenge, to check for some facts before responding immediately. I looked back at my blogs and noticed that many of my musings, particularly in the past weeks, has touched on the topic of leadership.

I don't plan my blogs. I have no strategy for the topics that pour forth from my musings. I write on the spur of the moment about a subject that has captured my thoughts. Recently, this has been, more frequently than not, something along the lines of leadership, or a topic in which leadership somehow weaves it's way into the narrative.

This topic has been on the forefront of my mind for many years. I have a red journal sitting at my bedside that contains many entries touching on leadership. This particular journal was started in 2006 with the aim of capturing my learnings and my thoughts on leadership with a focus on challenging myself to be the best leader I can be. Prior to that I devoured books about leadership. A leader is what I was. I wanted to improve my leadership abilities. A leader is what I am so I feel it is vitally important, my duty to build upon this gift I have been given. The journal is not always true to that focus but, I would say, 75% or more of the entries are about leadership. The very first entry, dated 26-Oct-2006, is an excerpt from a the book Winning by Jack Welch.

"Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others."

After two decades of being a leader, I have carved out for myself an opportunity to formerly grow leaders with the sanction of my company. When you grow leaders you multiply your impact. I am very excited about this opportunity so, naturally, it is going to be a frequent visitor on my blog. I feel this will build on my success last year and will be my breakout year, a formational year which will set the foundation for my future either in my current company or as a consultant. For too long in my life, I have waited for someone to shape the future, for the opportunity to fall into my lap. No more. Now, I am seeing a future take shape, a future I can believe in because it's a future I am creating.

Is my focus to narrow? Possibly and possibly not. The topic of leadership has recently dominated my writing and, to a large extent, my work world but does not have an exclusive hold on my life. Leadership is how I make a living, how I make a life. And my style of leadership is how I try to have an impact of the people with whom I work on a daily basis. My training program has also been added to my goals for the year so will have a significant impact on how I get evaluated and will have a direct impact to my bottom line. So, I expect to be musing quite a bit on this topic the next few months both in my blog and in my everyday thinking.

I am not one dimensional, in fact, I have many facets. Besides contemplating leadership, I enjoy a wide variety of interests from soccer to cycling to reading to travel to my family to my friends to a cute lass. It is only in my recent writings that I have kept to such a narrow focus. Sometimes a narrow focus is what is needed for a season in life to break down the barriers to wide open spaces.

On The Hook

The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires. ~William Arthur Ward


Now that my leadership training/mentoring proposal has been accepted by Senior Management, I am on the hook to produce a training program. The problem is, I am not trained to be a teacher. I am an Engineer who has, through trial and error, training, and many errors, has become a leader.  The challenging part is that the closest I have ever come to teaching a subject was as a soccer coach.

Coaching soccer was conceptually easier for me to embrace because I was working with kids, a group with which I am very comfortable and because my ability (or inability) to transfer my knowledge would not affect someones livelihood. My leadership program has the potential to directly affect a person's bottom line. It also has the potential to affect people further down the line when the trainees move into positions of leadership. This, for me, raises the bar for the quality of the training I will be providing to my peers.

When this idea was in the concept phase, a mere proposal to Senior Management, they importance of the task was an intangible. I could live happily in a world of theory that required nothing more than for me to bandy about ideas. Now, I must turn those ideas into something tangible. I am on the hook for a program replete with a lesson plan and materials with content necessary to build up the next generation of leaders at my company. There is a pressure on me to perform, a pressure from within because I know the importance of leadership in any endeavor and I take the role of mentor/trainer very seriously. The people in my program will be counting on me, the company is counting on me, I am counting on me....and that's just how I like it. It is under pressure that I do my best work, have the most fun. I am looking forward to an enjoyable next few months on the job.

R.I.P. Mia

A dog is the only thing on earth that will love you more than you love yourself. ~ Josh Billings

Her once jet black muzzle had become peppered with grey at once giving her the appearance of being wise and betraying her advanced age. We got her as a pup from a Wisconsin farm 13 years ago. As a puppy she had frolicked about yipping and yapping and nibbling at our fingers, licking us and leaving the scent of puppy on our face and hands. She loved to jump into the water to fetch a stick. But that was a life time ago in dog years.

I think in her dreams she remembered her youth, remembered the time when she could walk without pain, play without tiring. In her sleep, her legs moved as though she was running, chasing after the kids, charging after rabbits, fetching the tennis ball and bringing it back dripping with saliva.

The past year, the decay of age began to show increasingly, her walking became labored, her reactions slow to the point that her bark no longer coincided with any incident, her ability to hear seemed nonexistent, she struggled to stand because her hind hips were unstable, she needed help climbing up and down the steps. In the last week, her sneezing emitted flecks of blood. It was the blood that finally drove me to take the final step. As a young dog she enjoyed car rides, stuck her nose out the window and sniffed the air rushing across her face. Today, she took her final car ride, she lay in the back seat barely moving, oblivious to the breeze coming through the open window.

We walked into the vet and they lead us to a back room. They called her princess. In the room there was a soft blanket, a fitting throne for the aging lady to lay upon. It was in that room that I handed over the leash to the vet, in that room where I said my final goodbye, in that room where I rubbed her head for the last time before walking out the door for I could not bear to be there in that room when they vet helped her fall asleep for the final time.

It's All Disposable

Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong, and disposable. ~Cher


I used to be friends with a married couple, a couple in the prime of their lives happily married for 3 years and, by their account, very in love with each other. So, it came as quite the surprise to me when I heard they were getting divorced. They weren't getting divorced because they no longer loved each other, there was no abuse, no infidelity. They were getting divorced because the wife had a medical condition that would not let her get pregnant and the husband wanted to have kids. The husband had decided to discard his wife for something completely outside of her control. To me, this was callous, cold, and heartless. His wife ceased to have value not because of who she was but because she could not give him something he desired. She had been reduced from a human being to convenience store. If I can't get what I want here then I will shop elsewhere.

I guess this should not surprise me because we live in a disposable society. If something breaks we throw it away, if something is old we trade it in for something new, if a newer model becomes available we purchase it and let the perfectly good, old model collect dust in the garage. In a disposable society, things no longer contain intrinsic value. The value becomes reduced to what the item can do for us, how the item makes us feel.

With this mindset, we now market many items that are made to be disposable, use them, abuse them and throw them away. We have disposable cups, disposable plates, disposable silverware, disposable cameras, disposable razors, disposable diapers, disposable, disposable, disposable.

This mentality creeps into our treatment of people, many who are treated as if they are disposable. We put our parent's in old folks homes (euphemistically called assisted living to assuage guilt) because it's inconvenient to care for them ourselves. We get a new spouse because the old one has some wear and tear or there's a hot new model that will help us feel better about ourselves. We abort an unborn child because it won't fit our lifestyle. When the most innocent, the most vulnerable, the unborn child becomes disposable in the eyes of a society then, I guess, it's all disposable.

Growing Leaders, Part 3 (Go For It!)

I start with the premise that the function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers. ~Ralph Nader

I had this vague plan forming in my head over the past months. At first it was vaporous, fleeting ideas, unclear images to which I could not give form. They represented a feeling, a sense of something was amiss in my company. Then one early, early morning I was laying in bed wide awake suffering with a body that had yet to catch up the 7 time zones I had crossed the previous day the ideas started to take form. They were still amorphous but I was able to understand that which had been troubling me. We were an organization that had minimal bench strength, a organization that was not growing leaders. I presented a preliminary plan to my immediate manager and was told my vision paralleled an idea Senior Management had bandied about. I was also told that my vision was not large enough. My manager then told we I would be included in the talks with Senior Management to help craft the vision.

Well, I met with them today.  My manager opened the meeting reminding the other Directors about their conversation a couple months prior about a need to better develop leaders. He told them that I had proposed a preliminary plan along the same lines. When asked, I explained briefly what I had been thinking. They asked a few questions, primarily, how I would go about selecting the pilot group and made a few suggestions.

This is the only part of the conversation where my vision and theirs deviated. They wanted people who were interested in exploring leadership to be involved in a training/mentoring program whereas I only want people with a passion for leadership, people whose DNA oozes leadership, people whose internal gifts need nurturing to develop as quickly as possible. 

As the meeting was coming to a close, I was very happy we were, for all practical purposes, on the same page. I was happy that they believed in the vision I had begun crafting. I was happy that, by putting my vision to paper, I was able to kick start them into moving in, what I believe, was the direction my company needs to go so we can build a solid foundation for the future, for our future and the future of the Engineering group. 

However, I was not prepared for how the meeting concluded. When I entered the meeting, I was hoping to be at least a cog in their plan to grow leaders. So, I was surprised when the VP told me to go with it. He handed me the reigns to the program. I am now on the hook to put together a training plan and it's due in two weeks. The roller coaster ride has begun!